This past week one of the moms in my Mom's group turned 30. She invited us to a night at the MGM Grand. Massages, sushi, dancing, and no babies was promised. I immediately enrolled Nini (my mom) to babysit. I really couldn't wait.
Like most people turning 30, she was freaking out. Ending your twenties just sucks. Especially as a woman. If you're single, you're thinking, welp, there are younger hotter girls out there. Better start robbing that cradle. If you're not married yet, you're thinking, put a ring on it so I can pop some kids out before I'm the old mom. If you're married and have children you're thinking, welp, my husband is getting hotter while I scoop my lady lumps into a bra and pull my leggings up to that bra. I only know the married with kids part... so this list is based on that.
So here it is, a list why 30 is kind of awesome.
1. You go to a restaurant with some girlfriends, where you used to order a salad to avoid being that girl. Now you go ahead and order the fried things and/or burgers, whatever you want. Let's face it, it's not that hard to make a salad at home, and it's very hard to deep fry things at home (who has time for that anyway). Also, you just scooped your boobs into your bra, eat those fries.
2. Speaking of saggy boobs, you earned those saggy boobs and "soft" tummy. You created a human. Like, you made a human, while you're husband/partner rolled over and went to sleep. You carried that human for 9 months, pushed it out of a small hole, and then feed her with your own body. And that little human just said, she loves you. Boom.
3. At this point, you know what you're body looks like and your comfortable with it. Or at least made peace with it. What you didn't realize is, how strong you are. You can carry a car seat, maybe another 25+ child and a car full of groceries in the house while you're biceps ripple down. Not only physically strong, but you're mentally strong. You can listen to Frozen on repeat, non stop crying and manage to tune it out, make a schedule, pay bills, maybe hold down a part time job, while on little to no sleep.
4. You know who your friends are and how to make good ones, and keep them. You know that it takes two to tango, so if you're putting all the effort into a friendship, bye bye.
5. Your husband is your best friend. He's seen you do some weird shit (refer to 2) and then even weirder shit. The other day, after a friend got engaged she said to her fiance, "you've seen me drink cheese." That's right, he's seen you drink cheese, or whatever your equivalent is, and he loves you for that. You've also seen him do some weird shit too, probably not as weird as you, and that's even better.
6. You look at your husband, and just think HOT DAMN, you are so sexy. And you're mine. We're married. And that is awesome.
7. Speaking of that stud muffin that is in your bed every night, you can kill it between the sheets. You know what to do, and you know how to say no to the things you don't want to do. You've don't even have to fake it.
8. You know how to put makeup on yourself, and dress your body. You can go into a store and pick things you know will work. You can stop trying to be trendy, and just pick things that will work for you.
9. Your mom turns into a woman of wonder and mystery. How did she manage to raise someone so awesome? Share your secrets with me on a Friday night, over a bottle of wine. Then we'll both be in bed before 9.
10. You also realize, that family is everything. Weather it's the family you already have, or the family you've created.
11. Being in your thirties is really similar to being in your twenties. But, you've got money. Don't get me wrong, you still love a happy hour, but you don't have to have the bud light on special. You can treat yourself to a Sauvignon Blanc. Or you go to a nice dinner, order a steak and a nice bottle of wine. Then go to bed at a reasonable hour and not wake up with a hangover. Hangovers when you're in your thirties, are almost like getting 72 hour stomach flu. That last that long, there is lots of throwing up, but you can't sleep in, and have to care for other people and show up to work on time. Not worth it.
12. You now know why people told you to stay out of the sun. Sun makes you look old and can do some bad shit to your skin. Now that you stay in the shade in the summer you have way more time on your hands. You can also afford retin-a which is more like a fountain of youth in a tube.
13. It's so much harder to go on a vacation, so when you do, you appreciate it for all it's worth. Weather it's a European vacation, a weekend get away, a night off with the girls, or hell, a 90 min workout. It feels so much better than it did in your twenties.
14. You get to be a kid again with your kids. You get to watch them do stuff for the first time and see their minds blown almost daily. And that, my friends, is what it's all about.
In my two years of my thirties, I've also learned not to sweat the small stuff. I broke my car key in half in the ignition of my car in an Ikea parking lot the other day. After waiting for a lock smith, not being able to get it out but getting the car to start, leaving to go to the dealership just to get pulled over and ticketed. I made lemonade from a sack of lemons
Hello new ride!
